Death of a Salesman: RIP Billy Mays

As I was landing in NYC at JFK Airport yesterday, I was shocked to hear that my favorite TV pitchman, Billy Mays, had died. Talk about a salesman. I can honestly say that I have bought, or thought about buying every item that he has sold. Some have been lifesavers (Oxiclean), and some have been duds (sticky lights), and some still sit in my drawer waiting to be used (magic green adhesive aka Mighty Putty). I always joked though that I would buy anything that man sold! And I've been teased many times for it too! Ha! So here are a few of my favorite items hocked by the famous salesman:

Hercules Hook
These little fish hook looking guys are said to hold up to 150 lbs. They also seem super easy to install. Only three easy steps! O Billy, you make everything seem so simple, and necessary for me to buy! AND if you call now you'll get double the hooks for the same great low price PLUS a laser leveler which you totally didn't need, but is FREE so you are super excited to get it anyway! Ahhh I love infomercial gimmicks...

Mighty Mendit/Mighty Putty
I don't know which came first, the Mendit or the Putty, but does it really matter? They are problem solving necessities! I bought the play doh looking Mighty Putty. It seems magical really. BUT #1 What is it made out of that gives it it's magical powers, and #2 how do I get it off the wall when I want to move? If only Billy could tell me... I guess this is why I haven't used it yet.

Big City Slider
I WANT THIS PRODUCT! Yes I am infatuated with the Big City Slider Station. I could make White Castle's in my own home. Then I'd never have to leave! If only they'd invent a mystical machine that creates those little tiny buns...

Awesome Auger
I have no idea what this product actually does except it sounds like an adorable little animal, and it's apparently attached to a drill, which is cool.

What Odor?
I swear. That wasn't me that time! Ha! This spray is supposed to get rid of ANY smell. On the commercial they even show a little chihuahua leaving his bed, followed by a green funk cloud. One spray, and that puppy bed is smelling good. I wonder if this works for the dogs who don't like to take baths? Or humans for that matter... you know, just for touch-ups.

Handy Switch
I have always wondered why I couldn't have a light switch wherever I wanted. Now I can. This is an upgrade from the clapper because nothing says "this better turn on" like an actual switch. It's like insurance for your lamps. I'm thinking of putting one in my car and hot wiring it to my ignition. That would be AWESOME! Thank you Billy...

Samurai Shark
Look at this thing! You need this! As you can see from the picture above, if you don't buy this product, you will have your hand cut in half with dangerous scissors! I hate to burst your bubble, but this is a knife sharpener, not a shark with mini samurai swords and judo-chop skills like you'd hoped. We can always dream though...

OxiClean
EVERYONE has used Oxiclean. This magical powder allows me to clean up after myself. I'm kind of like pig pen. you can always tell where I've been during the day and what I've eaten by looking at my shirt... "Oh, it looks like someone had ice cream today!" Ha. There is no denying that. Thank you Oxiclean for making it easier to cheat on my diet.

Billy! You will be missed. Thank you for selling me things, and thank you also for never wearing one of those fake headsets.

NYC Flip Flop Feet

I love flip flops. Or as Steve and I call them flimp flomps. They are by far the easiest most versatile footwear to wear anywhere. You can wear them with jeans, or even sport them with a bridesmaid dress after your feet are killing you from breaking it down on the dance floor all night. OR if you live in New York, you can wear them to and from work, and secretly at your desk when you don't have to walk around... Ooops I gave away my lil secret.

The thing is in New York there are a few risks associated with flip flop wearing that other parts of the country don't have to be as concerned about. Here are a few of these reasons.

1. DIRT/GRIME.

This is probably the most obvious. Let me just tell you that here in New york it is DIRTY. Like construction site dirty everywhere you go. Walking around the city you might as well be barefoot. People spit and other dirty things all over the place. With so many people, there are bound to be a few dirty gross people out there.
Umm and did I mention that dogs poo on the sidewalk here? You should see their little faces when they gotta go. So sad. You can always tell the new dog in town too because he is clearly thinking, "Where the hell is the grass?"
After you get home from an excursion around the city, I suggest investing in a foot brush. This little bad boy will ensure that you don't get a bad case of "dirty foot", and that vegetation doesn't start sprouting from the cracks of your foot. Guys just don't like that. "Dirty foot" may lose you a few dates if you aren't careful. Uhhh! You mean I have to brush my teeth AND my feet? Ridiculous. But dirt and grime aren't the only environmental issue thing you have to worry about...

2.RAIN

Ah yes. New York is somewhat synonymous with rainy weather. I'm not talking dripping rain, although that happens occasionally. I'm talking about monsoon style downpours that last for hours which ensure a good drenching before you get to wherever you're going. This can create an extremely dangerous hazard for us flip flop wearing folks. You see, back in the day, when the settlers of NYC decided to construct the streets of the city, they were not thinking of flip flops... or flip flops in rain. You see the streets are not paved in gold, but some of the sidewalks and most of the gutters are marble. and those things are not conducive to rain. Another slipping hazard unbenounced to me until it was too late, are the cross walks. Apparently the white paint is slipperier than the black, and it really sucks to fall on your face in a cross walk. Let me tell ya. So if it is raining, you are better off in rain boots.. a survival staple in the city.

3. THE SUBWAY

O magical, mystical subway station. Why is the ceiling always dripping? And do people imagine that they are outside while in a subway station. It is NOT okay to leave trash/spit on the ground in a subway. What would your mother say? "Where you raised in a... subway?" And yes they clean the sidewalks everyday with hoses and such, but how do they clean the subway? when you figure that out please let me know...

4. THE 50 MILLION OTHER PEOPLE NOT WEARING FLIP FLOPS

So it's a little crowded here. There are probably 50 million people in like a mile radius. Okay maybe not, but it is PACKED. Most of these people are commuters. If they are in their 20's/30's and female, they are probably wearing flip flops with their work dresses/suits. If they are older ladies they are probably wearing tennis shoes, or are blessed enough to be able to trek around in stilettos all over town (they have surgeries for that ya know!) Or if they are men they are probably wearing super hard dress shoes, and most likely have huge feet. So the point is, if these people step on you it frickin hurts. And believe me, they are not watching where their going. It's the survival of the fittest, read rudest, mentality of NYC commuting. But you can get these clowns back as you fly past them on the sidewalk grates while they wait to pass on the side so their heels don't get stuck. Suckers.

5.ABNORMALLY LONG WALKS TO JUST ABOUT EVERYWHERE

I've said it before. If you don't like walking, don't move to New York. We walk everywhere! For a seasoned pro this is not an issue, because my little tootsies don't mind a little flip flop abuse for miles and miles, but if you have sensitive feet beware: flip flops may not be for you. And for God's sake: they are 2 for $5 at Old Navy. Buy a new pair once and awhile.

#MilitaryMon

Hey there Tweeps!!! That's Twitter talk for Peeps! In case some of you don't know. There is this social networking phenomena called "Twitter", and everyone who's anyone is a member. Ha! Actually I have approximately 3 screennames that I am responsible for keeping up. One is ArmyNYC, which is the Army in NYC's Twitter name. Ya, this is the most fun to take care of because it is HUGE. Some may say that "tweeting" is a waste of time, but I have found it to be incredibly useful. I can tweet about community relations events (ceremonies, top brass coming to town), internal comm stuff (Free stuff/promotions for military) and media events(Soldier participation in sporting events/talk shows etc) at the blink of an eye. It allows my office to get out info about Army happenings in NYC REALLY fast. If I have free tickets or need Soldiers for an event, I can put it out via Twitter, and get instant feedback. I love it!!!

I also just started a Twitter for my Air Guard unit in Ohio... 121ARW this is a great thing because being a guard unit, obviously we are not around everyday like a normal Air Force unit. This allows me to tweet to Airmen about stuff going on in our unit, and also to get news about the 121st out FAST. A lot of reporters and news stations are following our account already, so I know if something happens, I can get it out to them ASAP. this makes being a PAO a little easier ;)

And then there's my sad little personal Twitter account... lol. I basically use it just to adventure around Twitter, and learn new things about the site without using an official account. Poor buckinyc .... Someday you may have more than 40 followers.. or not o well.

ANYWAY... Today is MILITARY MONDAY (#Militarymon, and after searching through all the hashtags that related to it #milmonday, #militarymonday, #milmon etc, I guess someone finally decided on #militarymon as the official tag.

SO if you are on Twitter, use the tag #militarymon on Mondays. This is a great way to channel all of the military bloggers/tweeters in the same place, give shout outs to the troops (they do have Twitter in the desert ya know!), AND to just find some cool people with the same awesome interests as you...

One more thing... IF you use Twitter you need to be using Twitscoop as well. That is an AWESOME tool to find who is talking about your company, organization, cause, news, or even you... yikes.

Later Tweeps!

My parents on TV

Yes people. That is Barb and Gary Wonn sitting right on the ropes watching Tiger Woods on the 15th hole at the Memorial Tournament in Columbus, Ohio. Please enjoy their moment of golf spectator fame! Love you guys!

Lexington Ave Open-Air Market

I came into the city on Saturday, and right outside of Grand Central there was an open-air market just waiting for me to shop!
There was a lot a lot of different food.

And corn dogs

And hot dogs!


We had a lot of fun shopping around... I love NYC!

I Love NY... Even at war

David Guttenfelder
Spc. Zachary Boyd (in pink boxers) keeps watch from behind sandbags at his post in Afghanistan's Kunar province. AP


How did I not see this!?!?

In case you didn't see this, it is a 19 year-old Fort Worth, Texas Soldier whose unit was attacked in the middle the night. He jumped out of bed and put on all of his protective gear, except for this pants. The other two next to him were awaken by the shots too, but one is not wearing socks and silver tennis shoes. But he is wearing pants.

My boss just came up to me and handed me this article, and asked me to find out where this Soldier can be reached. Apparently the people from New York State tourism are trying to track him down to send him a care package. Maybe more boxer shorts???

Prince Harry

While walking down Lexington Ave on Friday, I was stopped by a guy who flashed his State Dept badge. I knew something was up. As I looked around I saw four other "State Dept" guys, and I knew someone famous was about to arrive. I racked my brain, and remembered that Prince Harry was in town, visiting the troops at the Veteran's hospital and enjoying a polo match. All of a sudden I heard sirens, and like ten black cars and SUVs pulled up, and out he came, and strolled into The Continental, smiling and chatting with bodyguards. He was adorable. Red hair and an adorable smile. Being a military girl, I was so happy he took time and visited some of our wounded vets. After calling every one of my girlfriends, I snapped a paparazzi style pic to send. Unfortunately my camera phone is a little less than paparazzi quality. Looks like I won't be taking up a new career...

I have marked Prince Harry with the "PH" and the real live paparazzi with the "P Person", taken from "Jon and Kate plus 8"...Ha!